FEAR!!

In my safe little world, I rarely experience fear. And THANK GOD for that. My life was nothing but fear when I was a child. But as I write, I am having a problem remembering experiencing the the sensation—at least for fear that lasted longer than a second or two. Sustained fear is, thankfully, a long, long way in my past.

Right in front of me, right now, is a large (and expensive) package of Malarone pills. I have to check the math, but I believe I have enough for my time in Kenya/Tanzania, plus enough for three days before I arrive and for another three days after I get home. I also have enough to try them for three days to check on my capacity to sustain them.

Malarone can cause psychotropic side effects and the HIV drugs I take are also heavily psychotropic. The side effects of them are quite severe, so I take my HIV meds just before getting into bed because for four hours after, I am a zombie. The question is my capacity to sustain two medications that have psychotropic side effects—it is a quantitative problem, not a contra-indication problem.

Psychoactive medications cross the "blood–brain barrier" and affect the central nervous system causing alterations in brain function and resulting in changes in perception, mood, consciousness, cognition, and behaviour.